i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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