no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
