I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
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