with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
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