were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch