And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
He's a Shit stain on my heart
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
