Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
