We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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