All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
