And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Randomize
