just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Operation Purity has been aborted
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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