I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
