I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
That accounts for only three of the penises
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Randomize
