What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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