Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
