Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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