this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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