Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Randomize