i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize