Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
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I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
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