it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
