Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize