people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
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