So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i just had sex bonerless
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Randomize