whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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