I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
