Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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