he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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