Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
