CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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