can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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