Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
