Whod you bang
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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