if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
