I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
