Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
someone owes me an orgasm
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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