she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
