I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize