We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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