Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize