was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
NoShamevember. You game?
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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