i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Randomize
