Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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