Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize