He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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