O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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