hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
