South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
