porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
