i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
