You're a womanizer and a bitch.
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I lost the right to judge tonight
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
