I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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