YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I'm like, not good at living.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
